But so?

Scenes spiral from a singular girl:
Endless streets,
on sky-backed grey
Closed-down bookstore,
brooding in symph
And then a sunbent crest of joy
me and my nymph

I ruminate in shape of submission
Teasing sets and stories that never were
See, she held me through the rain once
but this you know she never did
She sang inspiration to a quivering child
but me. the child, would have hid
She sidles on the by, glances aside
as I transmute wants and memories

Such confusions breed bonds
and it pushes prudence putrid
It intrigues my restless needs
now held, both in confluence
What a grievous dance!
as she takes me to her bosom
So many moments fleshed out so full
it burst apart an aching heart

As night turns dark, she turns to me
she chats in weary discourse
Now, it seems, nirvana speaks
Delighted without syllable
Or so mt mind would have
Or so my heart would make it
But so?
...
I do not want to break it?